I'm sitting here at the ELCA Churchwide Office, listening to a wonderful speaker educate me on what it might mean to be a missionary. It doesn't mean what we used to think it means. It's not necessarily cool to still go out to the corners of the world and change their religion. It is all sorts of things now, and I'm not here to tell you which of those mission paths are right or wrong, I'm just here to tell you that I'm having a great time learning.
To be honest I am having a hard time being here. I am extremely anxious, and just about the only thing on my mind is the paperwork for my visa. I am PETRIFIED that I am forgetting something, or that I wont get it done in time. I move to a new continent in less than a month. I leave my whole life as I know it, and start something entirely new. The people, environment, food, culture, weather, it's all going to be different, and I haven't even thought about it yet. I'm just worried about being able to get there.
I could not be more lucky to be in the company of such wise, kind, and worldly people. The staff of the ELCA is blowing my mind with knowledge and hospitality. The building itself is not what I was expecting at all. From the outside it is just an office building, but when I walked in it looked like a museum. The way that the building is decorated with art is so unique, I've never seen anything like it, and I've only been in two rooms so far.
I've met my fellow new Central Europe Teachers! I'm so glad I'm not the only one with questions, or that doesn't have every single piece of paperwork done yet.
This is a scary place to be. Everyone has a different background but all of us are about to leave our entire lives. Some of us are going to be gone for at least 4 years, and some of us haven't even left the country before. Wow! That's a leap of faith.
If I dissected the different parts of what a leap of faith is I would say it starts with the idea to do it, then you weigh whether or not it's worth it, then you decide it is worth it, then you prepare, then you realize it isn't logical and it's really scary, then you do it, then you feel the exhilaration that you pulled it off, then you smile and realize that you are capable of a lot more than you thought you were, then you move on to something even bigger with even less hesitation.
I am in the part of the leap where I think I'm absolutely nuts. I am the happiest I've ever been in my entire life, and I'm taking all of those things that make me happy and leaving them on the opposite side of the world for a really long time. What is wrong with me? For now I'm just not going to worry about it. I'm going to have a great time, I'm going to trust that I'm here for a reason, and that's it.
